It is barely noticeable to the untrained eye, but there are secret conspiracies all around us.  There are many things that the government and others don't want us to know about.  Being the astute observer that I am, I noticed one of these oddities at Myrtle Beach.

I first noticed something odd while I was at Myrtle Beach in March 2001 for spring break with some of my friends.  We decided to take a walk down the beach to take a look around.  We found some tracks from construction trucks and followed them down the beach with our eyes.  From far away, it looked like they were constructing a giant sand castle.  But as we came closer the picture came into focus.  Giant green construction trucks  were putting giant metal pilings into the beach.  The pilings were very long and went very deep down into the beach, only reaching as high as the sand.  In between the two rows of pilings was a huge hole, which was slowly filling with water.  This was very strange because the beach is very empty.  Nothing is ever built on the beach, pools are back next to their buildings.  The only thing we could imagine that this might be is the start of a new pier.  Maybe it was a foundation for a new pier.  So we continued on our walk down the beach.

The next thing we approached was even more strange.  We came upon a large stream of water pouring into the ocean.  'That seems normal,' you might say, since almost all rivers and streams reach the ocean at some point.  But it turns out this is an artificial stream.  Next to this stream was an extremely strange sign.  The sign (shown right) said "CAUTION - THIS IS A SWASH".  It said that this water was storm water runoff and might contain dangerous bacteria.  It also declared that it could be risky to swim within 100 feet of the swash due to bacteria.  Why they would openly dump bacteria infested water into the ocean at a public beach is beyond me.  But of course, who is to question the great South Carolina Department of Health and Environmental Control?  So although it seemed that South Carolina didn't care much for its beaches or citizens to put hazardous risks like this in public places, I didn't think anything more of it, so I finished my vacation and came home.

The mystery did not end there, however.  I came back to Myrtle Beach in June 2001 for my family vacation.  I was extremely curious to see what the giant green construction vehicles had been working on.  So during my first few days at the beach, I led an expedition  down the beach to find what they had been working on.  From a distance, I could see no buildings or any signs of construction on the beach.  What had they been working on?  As I approached the location where I had remembered there being construction, at first glance I saw nothing.  But then I noticed that the sand in this area was a little higher than everywhere else.  Soon I noticed the pile of metal pilings that had been used in March.  There were lying next to some green construction fence.  Now why would they put these in the beach and then pull them back out?  

A little further down the beach, I approached an extremely bizarre sight.  There were two rusting giant metal pilings in the beach tilted towards each other.  The two pilings could be seen from a great distance away and the waves motion around them had created a small pool where little kids were playing.  What could be the possible reason for these pilings?  As I walked farther down the beach, I noticed a giant orange ball.  I thought that it was just a giant orange beach ball that some kid or family had brought to the beach to play with.  Upon further inspection, however, it was not a beach ball.  The ball was sitting in a small pool of water on the beach.  It was attached to a rope, and the rope was firmly attached to the beach a few yards away (see picture inset).  This seemed extremely bizarre.  Normally I would think that this could be a buoy of some sort, but this ball was tied down inland rather than out at sea.

After I started thinking back to the swash scene, however, I quickly put two and two together to make four (see picture).  Due to its strenuous warnings about beach safety, the swash sign scared  many beachgoers away.  Even during the busy summer months, the beach near the swash was nearly empty, except for a few seagulls.  This is only a short distance from the metal pilings and the orange ball.  Now I realized that the metal pilings were a beacon.  These two giant metal poles were beacons to those above.  Aliens!  It now seemed that the deep hole that was being built with the metal pilings supporting it was an underground storage for alien spaceships, and alien garage of sorts.  But what about the orange ball?  Perhaps it is a sort of doorbell.  Maybe by pulling on the rope, the aliens inside are signaled and know to answer the door.  I can't be sure.

What I do know is that the South Carolina Department of Health and Environmental Control was helping to house aliens in Myrtle Beach.  Why were they involved?  What were they getting from the aliens in return for their services?  I am still not positive what the answers to these questions may be, but I have an idea.  The aliens, of course, would be more technologically advanced than us, since they have the capability to fly between star systems.  This also means that their medical knowledge should be more advanced.  Perhaps the SC Department of Health was using the aliens to help them discover cure to diabetes, cancer, AIDS, etc.  Hopefully with the help of the aliens and the South Carolina Department of Health, these problems will soon be solved.